bottled up tears

Today I want to cry.. and I want this feeling to go away... The feeling where your heart feels like it's skipping offbeat and your stomach is trying to escape through your upper abdomen.... I want it to go away and the only way I know how to do that is to cry.. But what do you do when you feel like you can't cry to the one who you need at the moment?

I cry alone... I don't let people see me cry if I can help it... Well about the things that truly upset me and affect me....

I feel alone.... I really wish Chelsea were here because I know that seeing her and talking with her would make me feel a little better. Sometimes I really do feel like she is the only person that gets me entirely... The only person that understands what I am saying without being offended. And sometimes I feel like she is the only one I can express myself to completely. Sometimes I feel like she knows how I am feeling better than I do.

I feel disappointed in the face that I am upset and the reasononing behind it is misunderstood.... and I feel alone... 2 feelings that don't mix well together.....

Tomorrow will be a better day... Lets hope.