Five Year Plan......

Five year plan... Five years ago my five year plan would have gone something like this: 1. Go to school and get a nursing degree 2. Find a guy that I would like to settle down with. 3. Become engaged within 2 yrs. 4. Married in a year after that. 5. Live in a house with my perfect husband. ................ Five years later from that...... I can tell you exactly how wrong that plan was...................... I RECENTLY started taking college classes at the local community college thanks to my employer, who I should mention has NOTHING to do with healthcare. (That dream was shattered shortly after I realized how crappy benefits were working for the company that I was). Although I do miss my job description and the people that I cared for, I don't think I would ever want to be a nurse. I mostly enjoyed the comforting side of being a C.N.A. and Med Tech anyways. I developed alot of great relationships and life skills from it. As far as finding a guy went... Ha.. I have to laugh at that because I found three great guys and thought I was going to marry at least two of them... For sure one. But that came almost three years into the five year plan. Two of the three were great guys! Treated me well and we got along... All three of the guys came from wonderful families that I miss dearly. But none of them ended up being the happy ending to my five year plan. Wasted years? I would say no. I learned a lot from each relationship and that is really what matters most. Sure I don't have a degree in anything, or more than just a couple credits under my belt. Sure I don't have prince charming to come home to everynight or a home to call my own... But honestly, what the hell is a five year plan anyways? At this point in my life, it's bogus. I have found that searching and striving too hard for what you "want" gets you further from it. At least in the love department. For me anyways. I'm not even sure there IS a perfect guy out there. Other than my dad of course. And I can say that with all honesty because well, my dad's amazing. It's going to take someone pretty special to fully fill his shoes for me...... It's funny how when you are young, you are attracted to someone completely opposite of your fathter... But the older and WISER you get, you want to settle down with someone who has all of your father's best qualities... I know.... *sigh* I'm getting older. While talking with a friend the other day we were discussing future relationships. He asked me what I felt that I was looking for. I told him that I didn't know, that right now I was focusing on myself as an individual. I told him that I know that love will come for me one day, in time. And with the right person. And I truly believe that. I am blessed and cursed to have such a nuetral mind and "flow". It makes it hard to really know what I want right now. But I figure that as long as I am self improving on who I am and becoming a happier better me, then all else (love included) will fall into place when the time is right. So what's my five year plan now you ask? 1. Love truly all those who are good in my life 2. Smile Daily 3. Continue enducation 4. Travel 5. Self improve Afterall one of my favorite sayings has always been "You can not love someone fully, until you learn to love yourself first." The time is now to learn about myself and love who I am. To make changes in my everyday life to become a better/happier me. Because I know in doing so, I will get my happy ending. No more searching, good things will happen on their own. It's time to live and let live!