My drum, My happiness, My parade.

Life experiences.... Lately, I think it is less of a plural and more of a singular kind of thing. To me, I learn something new about myself on a daily basis. I feel like I have become a much stronger person over the course of the past 3-4 years; a great deal of that growth has come in the past year a lone. Being single has allowed me to have a relationship with myself. Its allowed me to see myself for what I am worth, not for the worth I wish to be in someone else's life. My mind is stronger, my thought process is more clear, my heart is bigger, and my level of happiness radiates beyond imaginable.

Lately others have been asking me what is so different about me. I tell them its simple, I am happy. Granted I have lost over 20 lbs., but I honestly just feel like by soul searching and taking care of myself mentally and emotionally, I have become a better version of myself. I care less about people that are only around to benefit themselves; I exercise my mind and body more; I surround myself by others that motivate me and seem to bring out the "glow" within me. I don't talk much about my feelings to others, I don't think that will change. What has changed most is that I accept myself for the person that I am. I feel like there is always room for improvement on one's self. But my love for myself, isn't going to change unless is becomes greater.

It hits you hard when you realize the value you hold in one's life. Whether that value be gold, or of rusted metal, it shows you a little bit about yourself. By that I don't mean that their perception of you should factor in on how you value you worth; I mean that depending on how you take that interpretation, you can learn a lot about yourself.

I know my worth, I know I am a good person and deserve to be happy. I will not settle for less than that, relationship wise, or friendship wise. I value myself. I value my heart, and I value my feelings towards life and myself.

Right now, I am not searching for anything other than who I am. I have always said that; but I think I'll always be searching. To me, the journey of self discovery is one that is endless. People change, time changes, experiences shape us and mold our minds in to different forms of ourselves. Or maybe, its just me. Either way, I am not worried about the journey of others... Unless their journey of self discovery crosses the path of my own. Until then, I march to the beat of my own drum, and dance through the rain of my own parade.

Happy Fall.... May you surround yourself with others whose presence cause your love and happiness to radiate.

Cheers to Chelsea

"Hi my name is Chelsea, do you want to be my friend?" That was the first sentence that my best friend of countless years ever spoke to me. Seventeen birthdays later, and she is still my best friend. I can not thank God enough for bringing that little blue eyed, curly haired, ruffled sock, poofy dressed, ballerina bun headed tomboy in to my life. Who would have thought that several moves, the most heart wrenching of heart breaks, and almost 20 years later she would still be in my life?

We are polar opposites in more ways than we are similar, but we understand each other perfectly. We can tell if something is wrong with the other just by the sound of each other's voice. We claim each others families' as our own.I can't remember a Christmas morning that hasn't had her family in it since the first year we met.

States away, miles apart... She has been there for me in some of the worst moments of my life. She has been the shoulder that I cried on until I had nothing left in me. She has helped me see the lights in my darkest hours.She has helped me realize my worth and been inspiration to never settle for less than what I deserve. 

She has been a part of most of the memories which I cherish most.... I would be lost without her in my life.

She is beautiful inside and out and has one of the biggest hearts of anyone you will ever cross. She is selfless, genuine, hard on the exterior with a heart of gold. She is unorganized, goes with the flow, and hardly ever panics or plans... But that is why we work so well. She is the balance in our friendship; she really is my polar opposite. 

I could go on for days about how much her being a part of my life means to me. I could go on for years about the memories she is a part of in my life. And I could go on for eternity about the wonderful person that she is. But the fact is, if you haven't met her, you are missing out. I thank the Lord every day for being able to call her my friend. I can't imagine the person I would be if she never asked to be my friend that day in our single digit years. I can't imagine what my life would be like if we had lost touch somewhere after that. She has given me more over the years than I would ever be able to repay her for. I am a better person because of the example she sets for me. She is the best friend I never asked for, and the support in my life I wouldn't know how to function without.

Happy Birthday to one of the best people in my life. Thank you for being the spit fire, balls to the walls, tender hearted, genuine friend that you are. Thank you for always being yourself, and showing others that its important to never lose the person that they are under any circumstances. You are part of the reason I am the woman I am today. I am a better person for having your support in times of the good, the bad, and the in between. I can't even begin to describe how much our friendship means to me. I truly would be lost without you in my life. You deserve all that is great.

<3 <3 <3 Cheers to the past, present, and the years to come. <3 <3 <3